I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Randomize
