is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize