loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
i will never coherently bang her
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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