I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
