I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
