I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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