well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
i will never coherently bang her
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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