If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
