What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
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