Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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