It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
