Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
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