But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
