So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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