I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Randomize
