Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
