From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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