So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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