What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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