dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
