all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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