I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
operation harelip BJ is a go
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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