Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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