Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Such a big mess for such a small penis
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
