I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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