Whoa Z and x make the same sound
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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