Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
