the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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