I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I licked your asshole in confidence.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
