i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Randomize
