jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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