New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
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