i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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