I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
