I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
