I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
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