The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
