walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
