is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
