Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
