Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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