So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Randomize
