im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
