I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Randomize
