i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I am midnight drunk by noon
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
You've changed since you got that strap on
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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