ugly people sure do ruin things
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
