Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
