eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Randomize
