Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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