Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
So vagazzling was a success
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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