Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
